So you love your other half? But is it enough to be straight out and forward with them and tell them the truth no matter what situation you are in?
Most people have found themselves in deep waters because they have lied about a lot of things in their relationships. They said things or did things in the past in which they think their current partners will not approve of. Some have hidden their true identity from their lovers.
The question that slowly visits my mind is that if somebody loved you wouldn’t they love you just the way you are? And another thing is that if you hide your true self from the person you claim to love, then you actually wronging them by making them fall for the wrong person. They think you are someone you are not, so would that stand well with you? What if the table were turned and you were in their shoes would you approve of their behaviour or their manipulations?
I think one of the reasons many people lie in their relationships is because they are trying to protect their other half or they are simply afraid of losing the person they love. But wouldn’t it be good to just spit out the truth, sit back and let them decide for themselves what they want to do with the truth? After all if somebody is for keeps they will stay, they wouldn’t mind the baggage and situations you are in, and again your past wouldn’t matter much in the current association.
Remember that the past does not define who you are at the moment but who you used to be so if they have a problem with it then they are not worthy of you.
Love is supposed to be something special between two people who are so passionate about one another that they can’t even see each other’s mistakes. Love should be the reason you miss that significant other, want to hold them close, be there to wipe the tears on their face when they cry and be honest and open with them. So if you can’t do this with your significant other then you should take a step back and ask yourself ‘why’.
So you lied to your partner and hoped the truth wouldn’t come out? So what happens if that something you are hiding from them gets tired of playing hide and seek and slowly comes crawling out for him or her to see and know. Don’t you stand a much better chance of losing them now than if you would have come out and told them the truth?
We love our partners so much that we want to protect them and keep them safe from the truth because we believe that the truth might hurt them, but there is a saying” the truth shall set you free”.
I don’t think anyone of us should be turning a blind eye on the matter, I think if we really need to be in long lasting relationships with not much but just a few complications because every relationship has got its ups and downs we should be as straight as a ruler with our partners. Including about who we are and what we are all about. They took a chance at love and I just think we owe them honesty and transparency no matter how hard or difficult the situation. At least when they get into the relationship they should know what they are getting themselves into.
I know sometimes it’s not easy to just come out and say the truth, but how long are you going to keep lying. Lying is not an easy thing because you always have to look over your shoulder, worried that you might slip up and end up saying that thing you so much wanted to keep to yourself.
I think total transparency should be implemented in our relationships. So you ask” what if my other half isn’t as honest as me”?
Do two wrongs make a right? Negative plus negative will always be negative so you cannot want to be the villain or villainess in your relationship.
I know it’s hard but sometimes just being totally honest with yourself and the other people is a load off your shoulder.
Some people are so used to lying that we even end up believing our own lies, now if you have reached that stage, and then try harder to resist being even more addicted to your lies.
Lies cannot build anything but destroys; relationships that are built on lies are like a house that has been built without a foundation, they easily get destroyed.
Be a better man or woman, honest with yourself and the next person. Lies do not build but destroys.
By: MPHO P. MAKHAFOLA (THE BLACK DIAMOND)
Edited By: M.D.B