We love who we love regardless of the flaws others may see in them. Is it being stupid, or do we just love more sincerely and honestly than those who love with caution and reason?
In reality this feeling we call ‘love’ is just the result of hormones secreted in the brain, triggered by certain people and things we associate with affection, value and trust. We do not always choose who we love, or rather we are not always conscious when our minds choose to love somebody. Nor do we always know and fully comprehend, why it is we fall in love with that person.
Not every relationship is based on romance, same as. Not every romance is based on love. We live in a world where sincerity and earnest succumb to personal gain and ambition. More often than not, in this day and age women and men continuously engage in romantic relationships only with their personal interests at heart.
This could transpire as an act by one unto another, or one reciprocated by both parties. When this happens it is what I call “Lovers with benefits”.
Two people who are romantically involved, and have regular sex and could even get married, but for their mutual need of each other in order to achieve their life goals. They could either be looking at building a family, be it fame, career opportunities, financial freedom or even security. These are the people who become lovers with benefits.
It isn’t necessarily a bad thing at all, seeing that we all want some kind of satisfaction and benefit from our relationships. These relationships can bare such bounty as wealth, happiness and fulfilment in whatever the couple or individual is looking at gaining from the relationship.
It’s this kind of relationships that result in what is known as “power couples”. You find a pair of highly successful, wealthy and charismatic individuals who share common goals and have a unanimous vision for their lives. Lovers with benefits can be really resourceful to each other if and when they find the balance in their ambitions through mutual support and affection.
However, beware the pitfalls you may encounter as time progresses. You may find yourself having all you want in a partner, but lacking the emotional connection which draws you intimately to one another. This lack of intimacy may lead to one or both the parties turning to infidelity in search of someone they can emotionally relate to.
As much as the idea of “Lovers with benefits” may sound enthralling, it can easily turn sour faster than you can spell sweet.
With all said and done, I am no love expert and I can’t really say if this kind of set up will work for you or not. But one thing I know for sure is that when you allow yourself to love soul deep you will love the very imperfection.
By: BASIAME TLOU
Edited By: M.D.B