Relationships get torn apart very easily. Anything that comes between a connection such as love is never a good thing. There are various aspects that can affect a relationship such as race, religion and culture. You say impossible, let me break it down for you.
Race: based on our history that’s what causes separation. We are however celebrating 20 years of democracy but from my observations we have nothing completely solid to reflect it. It would be a shock to see a black and a white person walking together or any other mixed race because it is still a taboo. So which freedom of association are we referring to? It even reaches bigger milestones when the couple wish to take their relationship to the next level which is marriage. Some black and white communities believe the only way these two races can meet is through business, we are their servants. Plus there are issues of lobola. White people believe in engaging after a year of dating, 3 months later they set the wedding date followed by the honeymoon and bingo Mrs Van Wyk is her new name. But because of race things like these become difficult to adhere to.
Culture: yes even amongst ourselves black people we do have that problem. There are certain cultures that we are not supposed to be marrying in. Some parents are totally against multicultural relationships. In all honest I would love to marry either a Tswana or Venda guy. Cause Tswana’s are handsome and Venda’s know how to take care of their women and their family as a whole. Ever seen a Venda guy on Khumbul’ekhaya? Exactly! For example some cultures opt that their children go to be circumcised in the mountain while others beg to differ and say they would rather go for MMC (medical male circumcision). Cultural clichés can cause sufferings in your relationship.
And last but not least, religion. You’re Christian and your partner is Muslim. We know Muslim’s go to the mosque usually on Friday for their worshiping and religious practice. That day is considered to be the holiest time of the week while Christians have their Sabbath on the seventh day being a Sunday. What happens to your offspring’s? Yes children are what their father is but what if the mother is not willing to abandon Christianity because she was raised into it?
All these take place if neither one of you in the relationship is willing to compromise for the sake of your happiness. Like with the statement I made on the last paragraph of this column, if the mother can start learning ways of the Muslim’s and becomes a Muslim that would avoid wars and tension in the house. After all you knew what the man/woman was about; you could see they were white, that they are from Lesotho and that perhaps they follow the Muslim religion. Think all these things through and ask yourself if you will be able to enter a committed relationship given the persons beliefs. Otherwise stick to your kind, work with home ground advantage.
That’s it for the ladies night column for this week remember to follow me @Fanisawrites on twitter and also follow @TSA_pitori and we’ll kindly follow back take care and good night.
By: FANISILE NKUNA
Edited By: M.D.B